my life

When I moved to New London I had a plan. I was going to be here for 2-3 years then I was going to move someplace with my boyfriend who I loved so much I thought I would marry him. That plan was always up in the air YES, but I really thought it would happen. So when I moved so far away with out any friends I dident feel all that alone. Because I knew he would be visiting alot, he would be here for me when it was time to move. Now I am trying to face the idea that I am here and I have no "exit plan" for when I am ready to leave. Every night after work I come home and try and entertain myself for hours. It works till about 8pmish. Thats when I start missing him. I know its dumb but my phone used to be full of texts from him every day. I would talk to him every night. And he understood me. Now the only person I talk to at night is my mom and you both know that is not pleasant for me. Its like I am going though the pain maybe I should have gone though when I first moved here, but because I had nate it got pushed back. Maybe I dont really miss him, maybe I just really dont know if I like living alone. living alone with no hope of having someone to live with anytime soon.