Standing on the edge

I feel as if I am standing on the edge of a huge cliff. Its scary, and exciting, and scary. New york city awaits me and calls to me, but I am also so frightened. Of what it means for me, of what it means has ended. In many ways this means my childhood is over. I am not a college kid, I cant hide behind that anymore, nor am I living at home. No I am going out on a limb here. I am going to the biggest most exciting city in the whole world- and I know NOBODY. I am going into a really tough job situation which will be difficult on the best of days. I am scared of loosing my family (whatever I have left of them) I am scared of loosing my friends, I am scared of loosing my boyfriend, but let I have to push onward. Its all waiting for me out there, and I find myself wishing I was so much stronger then I am. I am scared, and there is no way to cover it up anymore.